Anyday now!

So still no baby! Today my doctor told me I was 3cm dilated and if I do not go into labor by Tuesday she is going to break my water! So if I don't have her this week she will defiantly be here next week! I'm excited and can not wait. But I'd rather just go into labor naturally, I don't want to have to have my water broke, but if that's what is gonna have to be done then I guess that's okay, because I really want her here!!!!

Waiting!

So last week when I went to the doctors I found out that I'm 2cm dilated and my cervix has softened all the way! I was excited, hoping I was going to go into labor soon. Then Tuesday I had another appointment and I'm still one 2cm dilated. I was hoping maybe, I would at least be 3! But of course not. I only have 2 weeks left til my due date, but I'm hoping I have her before my due date. I just want her out. Truth is I am really sick of being pregnant, being 9 months pregnant is not fun at all. It sucks. I keep hoping and praying every single day that I go into labor. I wanted to try to put myself in labor but most people say all the things you can do never really work. Plus my mom thinks I need to wait, and she will come when she is ready. I'm scared I'm gonna go past my due date, and I do not want that to happen at all, that would really suck! My doctor said that they will let you go up to 2 weeks past your due date before they induce you! OMG I think I would die. I'm miserable already, that would be horrible. So hopefully she isn't stubborn and she comes REAL SOON!

Soooooon.

3 1/2 more weeks! Time is going by so so slow. Hopefully I have her before my due date, I would love that. Thursday at my doctors appointment they are going to start checking if I'm dilating or not. Hopefully I am. I think she is coming real soon though. I've dropped, and last night while I was at the store I had 4 contractions in 2 hours then they stopped :( Then when I came home I lost a little bit of my mucous plug. Not all of it though.. which sucks! Hopefully I lose the rest of it in a couple days.

Just thinking.

So I can have Sophia any day now. I'm hoping soon because I'm sick of being pregnant! I am always sore and having pains. I feel fat :( I'm always tired. Pregnancy at the end is no fun. I'm hoping I go into labor in like the next 2 weeks, that would be great. My doctor says she can come anytime, I'm really hoping I don't go past my due date either. That would suck big time, I don't want to be pregnant any longer then 40 weeks! Hoping on Wednesday when I have my next doctors appointment  the doctor tells me she has dropped, I will be very excited. I just can't wait til I have her in my arms though. I hope she is cute and has a lot of dark hair. I think she is going to be a small baby also. The doctor said she is probably going to be around 6-7 pounds. I guess that isn't too small. Just hope she is as healthy as can be(: Aw I'm so excited to be a mommy.

Labor?!

I've been reading stuff on going into labor, and I'm so ready. People always talk about how painful it is and them being scared to go into labor. I think I will be fine, I mean I know its going to be painful but I'm good with pain and I can handle a lot. So I think I will be just fine(: I am going to get an epidural though. I don't think I'm going to be able to have a natural birth. I had another doctors appointment last week, the doctor said of course everything is fine and all my measurements and weight is right on point, so that's good. I only have 5 1/2 weeks until my due date!!! Aw so excited. I hope she comes at least a week early, because I want her in my arms so bad. I want to see what she looks like and I want to be a mom. These next few weeks better go by fast. Well I'm hoping they do, I'm so ready to have her.

Baby(:

My cousin had her baby a week ago, she is so cute and little! I got to see her today. Man I can't wait til I have my daughter! I hope she is that cute and little and has as much or more hair then she does. Hopefully they will be close when they are older cause they will only be about a month apart! Aw(: I'm excited. Seeing her just makes me wish I was due now!

Idk./

So I read more on breastfeeding and I think I'm still on the side of using formula. I know breast milk is better for the baby so they say but using formula is going to be a lot easier for me. With going back to school, then eventually getting a job and plus if I use formula when I need to do homework or just need someone to watch her they can feed her when she is hungry. Using a breast pump would be a lot of work also. I just feel like with all the things I need to do and get done after I have her, using formula would be best. I'm always going to use the bottles with the bags in them. They say they are the best kind because you can push all the air out before feeding them so you don't give the baby gas. I know people are going to think I'm doing the wrong thing for not breastfeeding but oh well. Its my baby and my choice. So I can care less what anyone else has to say.

Doctors Appointment.

I had another doctors appointment today. Everything is good as usual. I've gained 2 more pounds! I guess that's not to bad. I also have been having little contractions, nothing to bad though thank god! haha. My doctor said that having a few contractions here and there is normal for how far along I am. I'm glad because I was starting to get a little worried. I can't believe how much closer I getting to having her! It's so exciting. I'm 32 weeks, the doctor said that she can come anytime now. Hopefully she doesn't come to early though. I want her to be a healthy baby girl. Aw I can't wait to be a mom!!

Hmmmm...

I've been reading more of the book "Discipline from birth to three", so far I agree with a lot of what they are saying, then some of it I don't. The one thing I agree on is not screaming and hitting your kids. I really hate when I see parents screaming at there children, especially out in public! It's wrong, and when you scream at them and tell them to shut up or be quiet it scares them and makes them feel bad so they cry even more. Sometimes I think there are people who just shouldn't of had kids. I mean yeah there is just some stuff that frustrates you  and there is only so much you can take but if you can't deal with a kid then you shouldn't of had one. When I have my daughter I want to be the best parent I can be. Yeah I'm going to discipline her when she is acting up, but I'm not going to scream and hit my kid. I think that is just wrong and you should raise you children like that.

Getting things ready.

Yesterday I started getting the baby stuff together and ready for when she comes. I went and bought her bassinet yesterday also. I rearranged my room so I could fit everything in there. I can't believe she is going to be here soon! I set things up, but I still need to get a few things before she is here and was all the clothes and blankets. I feel like I have not that much more time left to do these things. My mom and sister said I've already started nesting, and they say it's not good cause I still have a few weeks left. I shouldn't start that til I'm almost due. I don't see why? I just want everything to be ready now, so I don't have to rush in a couples weeks to do all of it. Cause you never know when your gonna go into labor. Hopefully she doesn't come to early though. I'm not ready for her yet! Well I'm ready for her to be here, just not ready in the way of having everything she needs.

Doctors Appointment

I had a doctors appointment today, just for my normal monthly check up. Now I'm going to be going every two weeks because I'm getting farther along. I'm 30 weeks along, I'm almost 8 months! I'm so excited, I can't wait til she is here. Today I had to get a flu shot which was not painful at all. But the again I'm not afraid of needles and I'm good with pain. I got weighed as usual. I've gained 3 more pounds! So all together I've gained 19 pounds. To me that seems like a lot, but she said I'm right on point with my weight gain and that 6-8 pounds is just fluids. Gosh I feel so fat, but it's okay. Gaining all this weight is worth it. Then before I left she gave me information about child birthing classes. I'm thinking about going but I know my boyfriend isn't going to want to go. I guess it won't hurt to ask him and talk to him about it. Luckily the classes are free with my medical, otherwise if I wanted to take them I would have to pay $150. I'm so excited about this whole pregnancy. I don't know how many times I'm going to say that! haha

Breastfeeding.

I really don't know how I feel about it. I still haven't decided what I'm going to do, it's hard to decide. Some people say that breastfeeding is healthier for the baby and they don't get sick as often as bottle fed babies do. I know for a fact that isn't true. My mom breastfed my sister and she got sick for the first time when she was just a couple weeks old and has had ear infections all her life. She bottle fed me and I didn't get sick til I was about two years old and I still rarely ever get sick. I also know a couple other people who breastfed one of there kids and not the others and they were just as healthy or healthier. I have people telling me that if I don't breast feed its okay and others telling me that if I don't its not going to be good for the baby. Then I have the people at WIC who are basically pressuring me telling me that I need to breastfeed, and basically saying I'm going to be a bad mom if I don't. They are so rude. What makes me mad is that most of the people there don't even had kids so what do they know?! Just because some chooses to bottle feed their baby don't mean they are a bad parent. I have this feeling though, like I should breast feed her but then again I don't want to. Shortly after I have her I'm going to go back to school so during the day who is going to feed her? I wouldn't have much time to pump so it's like what do I do? I also sometime in the future want to get a job so I wouldn't be there to breastfeed her either. It would be much easier to use formula because whoever is watching her can feed her and I won't have to pump. When I think about it I feel bad that I probably will decide to use formula but my mom says not to feel bad because it will be a lot easier and a lot of moms choose to use formula and don't listen to anything WIC said. But AH! I just don't know. This really is a hard decision for me. I really don't have the much more time to decide though. I only have about 2 months left til she is here!

It's not always fun!

Being pregnant isn't always fun. I'm always tired and my back hurts. Some days my whole body is sore. I get leg cramps, I always have to pee! Some days my stomach gets upset by the smell of foods and even looking at certain foods makes my stomach hurt. I feel lucky though, some people have it way worse when they are pregnant. I only had morning sickness for about a week when I was three months along. The doctor even says I'm lucky. The doctor also says I'm doing good with my weight. I'm seven months and have only gained sixteen pounds, to me that is a lot! But as long as the baby is healthy when she is here I don't mind. I feel bad for my boyfriend, I'm so moody these days. I snap at him for no reason all the time. He always tells me I'm mean but he says he has to deal with it! HAHA. I try not to be but I can't help it. It seems like I've been pregnant for so long, I just want her here. The doctor thinks she will come a couple weeks early. So I have about 8-10 weeks left! I'm so excited(: They say she is healthy so far. The only thing is that need to eat better. The doctor and the book say different things about eating. My doctor says that it's okay for me to eat something that isn't healthy everyday and I can drink up to two cans of soda a day as long as I drink plenty of water. The book says that it's bad to drink soda and you need to eat healthy throughout your pregnancy. The book also says that you can eat fish while pregnant but my doctor says no. Which is weird, everyone has a different opinion so what is really healthy for my baby? I think I will just listen to what my doctor tells me.

First Appointments!

I think after I had my first OB appointment was when it finally hit me. I was like "Wow I'm really pregnant, I'm having a baby" It was when I heard her heartbeat. Hearing her heartbeat for the first time is something I will never forget. I can't even describe the feeling I felt when I heard it. After that I couldn't wait til I was going to have my first ultrasound. Finally at 20 weeks I went for the first one. The doctor told me that my due date would probably change after I had the ultrasound, and it did. We thought I was 20 weeks but I was only 18 weeks. It was so weird getting to see her. It didn't seem real to me. I got two pictures that day. One of her arm and little hand and fingers, then another of her legs all stretched out and her little feet and toes(: Three weeks later I went in for another ultrasound so they could get all her measurements and everything, which all of them were perfect. It was funny though, she was being a pain in the butt for the ultrasound technician and kept curling up into a ball. Finally after about 30 minutes she moved. The way she looked changed so much in that little bit of time, she didn't look like a skeleton anymore. She looked like a real person inside of me. I was waiting patiently for her to tell me the gender, and when she said she was 100% sure it was a girl, I just knew it. I got two more pictures, which those ones are my favorite. It was so cute, she was sucking her thumb. Shortly after I was 20 weeks is when she started moving around all the time, and now she just never stops! The first time I actually felt her move was when I was about 16 weeks. At first I didn't know it was her moving, it was just this little fluttering feeling in my stomach like when you have butterflies. Now when she moves it feels so much different and when you look at my stomach you can see her moving. I love it(:

My moms reaction.

I think reading the book "Your Pregnancy and Newborn Journey" is going to be helpful in a way. I have read the first chapter and a lot of the information is already helpful and making me think about a lot of things. I remember when I first found out I was pregnant. I was scared but at the same time I was happy. My boyfriend seemed to be upset and nervous at first. Telling my mom for me wasn't something I was scared to do and it wasn't hard at all. The main reason was because my mom kept saying I know your pregnant and made me go to the doctor to find out for sure and also because my mom and I are really close and I can talk about anything and tell her anything. When I was leaving the doctors office, I called my mom and I said I am pregnant and all she had to say was I knew it! She was upset about the whole situation at first because I'm only seventeen and she knows what it's like to be a teen mom. She was seventeen when she had my sister. She thought that I wouldn't follow in her or my families footsteps. Every woman in my family has had a kid when they were between the ages of fifteen and nineteen. My sister being one of them. She had her first kid when she was fifteen, she got pregnant with him when she was only fourteen. I see how they have struggled with jobs because they didn't finish school and that was something my mom was most upset about. That is why I am going to New Start, so I can have an education, even if I'm not graduating on time. Now my boyfriend was so scared to tell his parents, mostly his dad. The funny thing was his dad wasn't mad at all. All the had to say was things happen for a reason and now it's time for you to get a real job and be responsible so you can take care of your kid and your girlfriend. He said he is happy he is going to be a grandpa. Reading the first chapter and the part where other young moms tell about their parents reactions, some of them were horrible to me. Some parents didn't want to talk to them, some wanted them to get abortions. I don't know how any parent could tell their kid they need to get an abortion that is just horrible!! I don't know what I would do if my mom wasn't supportive. I know that right now everything would be a lot harder to deal with if she wasn't. She knows that being hateful and not supporting me would be the wrong thing to do. I respect and appreciate her for being there for me like she is because I know some teens don't have that with their parents. Now I'm just waiting for my baby girl to be here and I can't wait til I have her in my arms.